We only go for the really BIG ones here and they don’t come much bigger than the question of whether we are sharing the universe with other life forms. The internet is filled with public opinion polls on this issue, one going so far as to report that the results from thousands of studies conducted over the past 50 years reveal that half the world’s population believes UFOs exist. Perhaps even more astounding is the figure that five percent of the world’s population – mind-boggling 300 million or so souls – has apparently eyeballed either some alluring alien or its mode of transportation.
Now, these numbers don’t particularly surprise me or give me any more reason to believe than not that we’re sharing spit and/or some other DNA liquid with other life forms. But before I get to my reasoning on this belief, let’s cover some of the main arguments thrown up by this 50 percent who believe in extraterrestrial existences.
It usually involves some prehistoric monument like England’s Stonehenge, which, so their argument goes, proves the existence of assistance by higher life forms, because how oh how could prehistoric man move these large stone tablets tens of kilometres and then position them so perfectly?
I got news for you – it’s easy. For starters, Coronation Street, East Enders and Michael Parkinson’s chat shows were only in pre-production stages during this time period, so these highly motivated cave dwellers had lots of spare time on their hands. What better way to bond with your mates than dig a bunch of boulders out of the ground, cart them across hill and dale and then stand them up in a perfect circle?
C’mon, it beats working for a living.
The other main arguments – particularly stemming from the USA for some reason – involve these five percenters who’ve seen a UFO. If that’s true, why are so many of these sightings in tiny southern towns with names like Gnawbone and Podunk, where songs such as ‘Duelling Banjos’ still lead the hit parade? Let’s be clear here, the words ‘Intelligent’ and ‘Life’ will never, ever be seen together in them parts of the good ol’ US of A.
After dispelling all these compelling arguments in the positive, you’re probably wondering how the heck I’m going to actually come down on the side of believing in other life forms, eh?
It’s simple. The mistake many people make is to view these alien life forms as either little ore than sub-human slime balls or super-human beings capable of feats well beyond our pedestrian capabilities.
I believe there may be millions, perhaps even billions, of other life forms out there who prefer to live out their lives in much the same way as most of us – n quiet respiration. That is, what’s to say these guys, gals and whatever other genders may e out there, have little interest in seeking out new frontiers? After all, how many of you truly, truly want to pull a Captain Kirk and traipse your way all over the universe looking or Kling-on bling-bling?
Not many. So who’s to say these inter-galactic neighbours don’t also prefer hanging around the home sphere, tending to their craters while quaffing radioactive cocktails and coagulated moon dust puff balls?
Sound far fetched? Perhaps, but so are many so-called life forms on this planet, such as the bizarre world inhabited by a great deal of our celebrities. All things being equal, my imaginary, inter-planetary colleagues lead a much more ‘normal’ existence.
Who among you wouldn’t like toy yell out, even just nice: “Hey, barkeeper… another round of upside-down uranium drainers!”
