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How to turn our daughters into powerful business leaders of the future

March 9, 2011 | By Jane Toohey

Recently, I attended the Thought Leaders breakfast at AIM about gender disparity at the CEO level in Australia, presented by Terrance Fitzsimmons.

Interestingly, the research shows some real gems of wisdom about how to raise girls to become future leaders. Our lessons about leadership start very early on, it seems, and our ability to lead is ingrained well before we even leave school.

The five key lessons I learnt from the breakfast amazed me. As an active member of Women on Boards, I had mostly decided it was at the organisational level that the change is needed. And change sure is needed. 51% of university graduates in Australia are now women, but only 2.5% reach senior executive levels in our organisations.

1.  Girls schools could produce the next female prime minister

Boys get to learn their leadership skills very early in life, taking on roles like captain of the footy team, learning confidence and survival skills by going camping and fishing with dad.

Girls often miss out on these opportunities because it is not a ‘girl’s role’ or not a traditional girls activity.

In the traditional family environment, girls often do the ‘softer’ things, encouraged to care and nurture, not stand up and take the lead. They have to develop leadership skills later in life, often on-the-job.

Interestingly, a large number of the top executive CEOs in Australia went to all-girls schools, where leadership roles for women are an everyday occurrence and the gender issues are not present.

2. Male mentors fear making a mess

To become strong leaders, girls need access to male role models, but often are held back from enrolling those mentors for fear of sexual overtones or compromising the male mentor due to female partners attitudes to them spending time with another female.

We have to find a solution to this, to ensure our male senior executives feel ok mentoring women.

3. The “Ideal” Family Upbringing may be limiting

In traditional family environments, the male takes on the leadership role for disciplining kids, going out to earn the money and doing less of the domestic duties.

There seems to be some evidence that some sort of family trauma that leaves the girls having to take a primary leadership role early on, sets them up for leadership later in life.

Amazingly, all the female CEOs interviewed for the research fell into this category of not having a traditional family environment when growing up!

This made me feel better, as being a single working mother, my children are already taking on leadership roles, especially my daughter.

4. Teach them to be confident in their own skin

Lack of confidence is the thing that so many of the female CEOs mentioned as the major obstacle they had to overcome to reach the top.

Why do we teach the boys confidence and not so much the girls?

To some extent, confidence is learnt in battle and boys are encouraged to go to ‘battle’, whether on the rugby field, playing rough and tumble or in even online now with electronic games, whilst the girls play more quietly at more gentle pastimes.

Now, I know this is a huge generalisation, but to some extent still true.

5. Stop pigeon holing them

We fall quickly into what society expects, we dress the girls in pink and the boys in blue from day one. We have to stop doing this, and allow equal opportunity for our children to express their individual tendencies.

The concept of “the warrior” psychology has been gaining traction of late, but arguably it has been present in females as well as males over the course of history. As recently analysed, female warriors protect their tribe against all odds, while males conquer and divide. In the business world, there is a need and place for both approaches: it’s time to take a stand for females in leadership roles here and now.

Do you have any tips for raising entrepreneurs and leaders?

Jane Toohey is strategy director for Lumino Brand Design Agency in the Valley. Lumino was started more than 15 years ago by a woman, Pip Mcconnel-Oats, and has powered through recessions and 2 partnership changes to become one of Brisbane’s leading creative forces. Now with 2 women at the helm, Lumino is set to blossom.  Both ladies have driven successful businesses and both have daughters, so watch this space.

Female warriors protect their tribe against all odd, Males conquer and divide, there is a need and place for both approaches. Female warriors protect their tribe against all odd, Males conquer and divide, there is a need and place for both approaches.

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  • http://twitter.com/leena_green leena_green

    Can I make a space for the other side of the coin – caring and nurturing are not inferior activities or occupations – they are just not well paid, either as industries, and as a result, as individuals. As low margin industries they’ve found ways to attract people with work structure benefits, rather than income. (you’re more likely to find a 0.4 nurse or teacher than a 0.4 corporate leader).
    While only women can bear children, the time consuming part is raising them. Doing that requires both time and money. There can be many ways to arrange who gives time and who gives money – but if the high margin industries could bring time into their remuneration equation, and we could recognise caring with more margin, possibly we could end up with better models to base our sense of leadership on than ‘battle’. If female leaders will achieve this, then amen, sister.

    [Reply]

    Lumino Reply:

    There was a great comment made by one of the male CEOs Leena in the research presented, that if CEOs were mothers there would be a lot more female senior executives.

    [Reply]

  • Kathrynananda

    Many of the tips here seem to relate to an old paradigm that has very little (if anything) to do with my experiences of schooling/family culture/hierarchy, and I would hazard to say likewise that of many of my friends and colleagues. That is not to say that it’s not relevant to, and descriptive of, certain elements of the broader community… I just question whether it is responding to the modern ‘dominant paradigm’.
    To me, a better question to ask is ‘How do we honour the feminine in our leadership styles and decisions?’… and I actually phrase this in a non-gender-specific context. Patriarchal leadership typically has great difficulty encompassing such things as flow, intuition and deep authenticity/ vulnerability. As we all become more integrated and evolved humans, irrespective of gender, we start to find the balance of both masculine and feminine principles within us all. Each of us stepping up as balanced role models, pursuing our passions in the world and making THE difference we are here to make… this is SURELY the best way to inspire future generations of leaders, regardless of gender. No?
    The possibilities and limitations we programme our children with through both our language and our actions is something we all need to take responsibility for. If we tell them the world is a dangerous place, they will live in fear. If we tell them that they are capable of overcoming any challenge, and creating a world filled with beauty, then that is likely to become a self-fulfilling prophecy. :-)

    [Reply]

    Lumino Reply:

    Kathryn I totally agree, we all need to responsible for the words we speak and the example we set around our children. There are some outstanding examples where female executives really are honoured for their leadership styles and supported in a way that enables them to take on these leadership roles but they are few and far between unfortunately. Westpac’s head office has a creche on the ground floor and activities for children right up to grade 12. Kids are encouraged in the workplace and often can be seen sitting at a spare desk doing home work being near mum, without feeling unwelcome. This type of support is what we need more of.

    [Reply]

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  • http://www.salmark.com.au Sarah Hallett

    Well, here is an opportunity to establish a mentor introduction and relationship management business… BRB ; )

    [Reply]

  • Suzy

    If i work to this list I feel depressed. My daughter won’t go to an all girls school, we have a traditional family, society is teaching our girls to stay away from men (fear of interference with our kids) and my daughter doesn’t play rugby. If I take a moment to reflect on our family though .. my husband does the ironing, I have my own business, chores are divided equally and we are rigorous in our communication regarding gender issues. There .. not feeling so depressed now.

    [Reply]

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