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Kids at work – Not making sneakers? What the?!!

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Once again, our leaders have taken missing the point to a whole new level, after Senate President John Hogg removed Greens Senator Sarah Hanson-Young’s two-year-old daughter from the Upper House last Thursday.

I’d like to see the productivity of parents and the workplace measured. Show me the difference from before and after kids have been allowed in.

It would be a brave optimist who’d claim there’d be none and God help any psycho who thinks productivity would actually go up (child-care centres excluded, of course).

In fact, I reckon you don’t even have to measure the effect. Just tell people that their productivity is being monitored and that they’ll be paid accordingly. See who brings their kids to work then.

But let’s take this further. How about we be properly fair about this and also allow co-workers to attribute lost productivity to the children of others. Let the parents pay for other people’s involuntarily lost productivity.

After all, parents you are supposed to be responsible for your kids, right?

I bet the kids that are brought into work in that context would be well behaved and pleasant to be around. I think I’ve stumbled on the solution to a major sociological problem!

Of course, there are plenty of other distractions in workplaces. So parents, I’m afraid it isn’t all about you this time. What about the guy who has all the funny stuff in his cubicle, the internet, the wildlife volunteer with a possum in her purse, coffee vans, the woman who insists on talking at the top of her voice all the time, popping out for a cigarette, meetings without agendas, irrational and misguided decisions from superiors, the tradey who has to keep getting his dog back from down the road and so on.

Of course all great plans have a flaw. Just how do you measure the productivity of our politicians? Maybe we should just leave the kids to run the parliament and send the politicians out. Childish behaviour does seem the norm in that place.

Damn it. And we were so close.

There is, of course, “un-common sense” that we could apply to all of this. I say “un-common” because, from what I’ve seen, common sense got us into this mess in the first place. Common sense ain’t all that good. If it was, it would cost more and not be so common.

It would be un-common for us to be a little bit understanding of other people, whichever perspective you are coming from. It would be un-common to ask some questions and try to understand instead of just assume. It would be un-common to think a little and be fair with what you expect other people to put up with.

So let’s all be a little un-common with each other and sort it. Yeah, child’s play!

David Moore has 24 years experience in the computer industry and is now Principle PC Hater at ihatemypc.com.au

Photo: chimothy27 (Flickr)