With technology making it easier to connect with one another through social media, the general impression is that we are all coming closer together. However, as Nigel Malone heads off on his first holiday in four years, he considers whether perhaps the reverse is happening — that our increased social networking capabilities make it harder to leave work behind.
There’s an old song from the 1970s by Harry Chapin called “Cat’s in the Cradle” that tells the story of a father who misses many of the best moments of his growing son’s life, because he’s too busy working.
My child arrived just the other day
He came to the world in the usual way
But there were planes to catch and bills to pay
He learned to walk while I was away
And he was talkin’ ‘fore I knew it, and as he grew
He’d say “I’m gonna be like you dad
You know I’m gonna be like you”
Of course no such thing would happen with today’s technology and social networks. Their advertising and spin tells us we can be always be ‘connected’ to the people that matter in our lives. But should we chat to our children on the iPhone, or eye-to-eye? Is Facebook as good as a family get-together? What is the difference between old-school human interaction versus today’s arms-length controlled, composed, hit-and-run, keypad conversations?
It’s all just part of a bigger trend coined by the Future Laboratory and LS:NGlobal as ‘Bleisure’ – the blurring of the line between business and leisure. It’s off the back of a new generation of workers that have developed the ability to work on a spreadsheet, chat on Facebook, Skype friends and monitor emails, all at the same time. They have trained both sides of their brain to work in unison and use gadgets like they are an extension of their body. For these individuals, and you’re likely to be one of them, there is no division between work and play — they are just permanently ‘on’.
“When I see my staff on Facebook, I no longer think they are skiving,” says Martin Raymond, editor-in-chief of LS:NGlobal. “Today, they could just as easily be working, sending out press information, researching a contact or arranging a meeting.”
So I ponder this as I head off on my first holiday in four years, with the sole objective to reconnect with myself and my wife. Will my room have wireless internet access? Heaven forbid I would have to sit at an internet booth in reception all night, to finish off this article that I had secretly scheduled in while my wife sleeps.
Is the fact that I know I can check my business emails on the beach on my 3G Smartphone the only reason I felt safe enough to leave the office and take a holiday in the first place? It struck me that the more we think technology is helping us stay ‘connected’ with family and friends, the more we are in fact disconnecting. Nothing really has changed since Harry Chapin’s day.
I’ve long since retired, my son’s moved away
I called him up just the other day
I said, “I’d like to see you if you don’t mind”
He said, “I’d love to, Dad, if I can find the time
You see my new job’s a hassle and kids have the flu
But it’s sure nice talking to you, Dad
It’s been sure nice talking to you”
And as I hung up the phone it occurred to me
He’d grown up just like me
My boy was just like me
So it’s morning now on the first day of my holiday. My wife is still sleeping and the article is almost complete. I reflect again on the thinking of LS:NGlobal. Perhaps in a world filled with WiFi ‘hotspots’, the tide will ultimately turn, we will correct our business/leisure balance and start to seek out ‘coldspots’ — places purposely designed or protected against ‘connection’ via technology. I know that’s what I’ll be looking for on the rest of my holiday.
Nigel Malone is a freelance brand strategist and writer, with particular expertise in the fields of tourism, finance, technology, sustainability and social change. Find out more at www.icycalm.biz
Photo: Rocketvox
9 Comments
josh reeve
November 30th, 2009 at 12:28 pm
Couldn’t agree more. Our holiday home only recently was able to recieve mobile phone coverage on most networks. There was no decent television signals and little FM radio. The opportunity to go down to the shack was to switch off from the world and enjoy the time there with friends and family.
Today when we go dowm, people are on their 3G phones, tapping into Facebook, twitter and checking emails. The TV is blarring in the background and the converation stalls every time someone gets another sms.
We need rules now to get people to enjoy the time there and turn off their phones and i am still refusing to put a television in the house on principle.
[Reply]
josh reeve
November 30th, 2009 at 12:29 pm
sorry, part of the family bring their own TV down for the kids… not happy!
[Reply]
Fraser
November 30th, 2009 at 4:52 pm
Doesn’t it all just come back to control and choice.
Are you controlled by the technology or does it control you? It’s your choice
[Reply]
Liz Walker
December 1st, 2009 at 3:41 pm
One of the most important things I attempt to do on a weekly basis – is have a day off from the computer. I work from home and from the office – and find myself sneaking a few extra minutes after dinner and before breakfast – every opportunity I can in order to plough through the ‘To Do List’.
If I don’t take a day off, it can become out of balance. A good week is when I take two days off – when I connect with purpose – with my family and with friends – face to face.
[Reply]
Simon
December 1st, 2009 at 4:53 pm
The second I am not ‘required’ to have a mobile phone it is being turned off with a message that says ‘I am not available please call my PA’. I will only turn it on if I am having a heart attack or the car breaks down.
There is nothing more destructive to the human condition than being always available.
[Reply]
Serge Lescouarnec
December 2nd, 2009 at 1:48 am
Nigel
Just discovered the magazine
Quoted your article in Find a Cold Spot, Disconnect from the Web, Get Face Time with your Life for my weekly ‘Monday Work Etiquette’ on ‘Serge the Concierge’.
I was surprised to see that it was your first vacation in 4 years.
I thought the US was the only ‘No Vacation Nation’
Serge
‘The French Guy from New Jersey’
[Reply]
DigiGifts
December 2nd, 2009 at 9:12 am
I actually think the web and technology is making people communicate less offline and become addicted to their online worlds.
Most evenings myself and my husband sit on the couch watching television after a long day at work, but instead of interacting with each other, we spend most of the time interacting with our iPhones and online worlds. I sometimes wonder what life will be like when we finally have children, will we all be sitting around the dinner table playing with our mobile devices struggling to disconnect from the web? It reminds me a little of the movie ‘Back to The Future’ when they go forward in time and the kids are wired up to their technology gadgets.
Mind you as a small business owner I find turning off from the web a hard process. I get email enquiries and orders daily at various times throughout the day and night. I also like to keep my social networking followers up-to-date with latest product releases, trends and specials. Not being connected to the web as often as I am means my business and customers don’t get the attention required.
[Reply]
David Masters
December 5th, 2009 at 1:45 pm
Hi Nigel, I am so pleased you are back from holidays, I have another 4 years of work to chat you about.
You see, I attended a two-day conference this week and sat there for the entire time in one of those “cold-spots”. At first I started to feel the stress build up, not being connected to the office or home, then a few hours later something else happen… how cool and free it feels to be disconnected. I had time to focus on the conference itself, with out distractions and some spare for dream-time, which is the birthplace of strategy for me.
… and hey, i did leave an “out of office reply” with contact details of someone else to contact in my office for urgent matters and my wife knew were I was.
So, thanks Nigel for helping realize the importance of finding a “cold-spot”.
[Reply]
Nigel Malone
December 15th, 2009 at 2:24 pm
my pleasure david, looking forward to the next four years
[Reply]