Because it’s Friday (and Beer O’Clock is nigh), we thought it might be fun to assemble Anthill’s Top 10 Most Brainless Consumer Products. We made it to five before our thirst became too great. So, we’re delegating the remaining five to you!
Coming in at #5… The Comfort Wipe.
You may already have witnessed this ad for the Comfort Wipe, as a natural magnet for comedic commentary. To jog your memory (and any other natural movements), it’s “the first improvement to toilet paper as we know it since the 1880s!”
At #4 (and the nineteenth hole)… The Uro Club.
With so much potential for double-entrendres and innuendo, writing an introduction for the Uro Club could almost feel like cheating. So, let us just say, golf players might empathise. As for the rest of us… WTF?
At #3 (and guaranteed to get the blood pumping)… The Shake Weight.
Now this consumer product might actually have some merit, particularly given the success of other exercise products sold late at night via infomercials. However, we suspect that the last thing most night-owls will be thinking while watching this blood-pumping weight exercise after a late night on the town will be how to get “strong, sexy and sculptured arms. Yup, this kebab is a spicy one.
You’re not alone if you ever marvelled in pre-adolescent glory at your own sartorial creativity after turning a common bed-sheet into the wardrobe of a ghost (“Whooohahah”). Most sensible people quickly moved on. And then there’s the makers of the Snuggie Blanket.
And at #1… drum roll please…
At 4pm on a Friday afternoon, who doesn’t need an icy-cold beer flung at them from five metres away? Introducing the the Beer-Launching Refrigerator!
What on earth these inventors were thinking one can only guess. As for the marketers who encouraged them… well… we can only say, ‘Thank you!’